New perspectives captivate me. My new guest provides that. Asmini discusses overcoming a taboo part of life to find her strength and joy.
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You do not want to miss this…
The emotional warmth of the Autumn season has truly filled the corners of my home and the energy of my family is at an all-time high as it’s finally cooling down a bit here in North Texas. The Festival of Lights, or otherwise known as Diwali and the Indian New Year are approaching very quickly.
Growing up in America, celebrating Indian traditions and holidays are among my most cherished memories. It was a time I spent eating homemade specialty foods surrounded by family, love, and laughter. At this time, Indian families around the world welcome the Goddess of wealth and prosperity to light up their path and remove the darkness around them.
Lighting decorative candles and embracing artistic expression are definitely a must right now!
Even still, my mother and grandmother spend many hours creating a renewed atmosphere by refreshing the home and the family temple as well as making delicious homemade Indian treats. I was born in Oklahoma and raised in Texas and have always been a proud Texan, but I am so very proud of my heritage, the Indian culture itself is beautiful, distinct and unique, and is built by men and women of great tenacity, influencing philosophy not only across Southeast Asia but also the world. I look ahead and think about raising my son and creating similar experiences for him and combining them with my very American spirit.
I realize as mothers, we often become so consumed, at times, by what we want them to experience rather than enjoying the moment and letting it become an entirely new version of the tradition for us and for our children while still honoring our own childhood memories.
I encourage myself and all of you to stop and remember as this special season approaches, to be mindful of the fact that all we have is this moment and to allow that to be our joy.
As a single mother of one, this time of year is all about creating new versions of normal. It has been a relatively short amount of time since my ex-husband and I separated, about 2 years, but already feels much longer in some ways. As the saying goes with children, the days are long but the years are short.
Fortunately, we have built a steady co-parenting relationship and it seems to be working well at the moment. It has been so crucial for me to nurture a routine of self-love as I put my opinions and the opinions of others aside and objectively parent in the best interest of my son and in the process, own who I am and own my story. Each day, my son gives me the continued strength I need to be the best version of myself.
In the Indian community that I was raised in, the term, Single Indian Mother, is almost an oxymoron phrase. Living alone, working, being happy, having fun and raising a child with their father, who is no longer the mother’s romantic companion is very taboo and reflects an unacceptable lifestyle in many Indian communities even in modern-day American. A single mother does not mean the obvious, it does not mean raising your child alone forever, it is not a life sentence of unhappiness and failure.
Fortunately, strong, like-minded women continue to rise to the occasion, owning their stories, and making a difference for themselves and their children.
While single parenthood may not be a planned action for most, I look at it as a gift of sorts. No matter what the reason for separation, each woman has the right to her own happiness. Where she is not happy, she does not thrive and as a result, her children may not thrive, and societies may not reach their potential. I am proud to say that I am among the brave who stepped out and created a new paradigm not only for my mental stability, sanity, and peace but for my son’s as well. It was the single most difficult decision I have had to make, and the fear of change, failure, loneliness, or judgment, were just a few of the disrupting emotions that took over my entire being for a short while.
Nonetheless, one day at a time, those emotions left the party, and others joined. Feelings of being brave, vulnerable, strong and acknowledging a sense of accomplishment with the tiniest victories, started to fill the air especially as I intentional made changes to my lifestyle, the people that I surrounded myself with, and the boundaries that I created. It is important to note, that the negative emotions cannot be suppressed, they have to be assessed, accepted, loved so that they can be released! There is no greater happiness than what is felt after you have overcome great difficulties or hardships.
My purpose is to raise awareness to the strength of the women that chose to create a new normal, to fight for their families, to own their lives and empower those very same women to be the best version of themselves and in turn raise amazingly resilient, happy children.
I am a believer of faith and destiny, in that, all things have a reason and if it didn’t break you, it will make you stronger.
Sometimes, I say, jokingly, “I think I’m good, I don’t need the additional strength!” Surprisingly, we don’t have a choice! All jokes aside, the power is already in you, to become a mom elevated! I am very fortunate to be here with you as a guest blogger, thank you for continuing to inspire me and so many other mothers every day.
Take back your life! You only have one.
Signing off and sending you vibes of peace and love.
Asmini
In her blog, Asmini shares about herself and lifestyle as a single mother co-parenting with her son’s father, while working full-time as a Healthcare Professional. She has made it her mission to inspire mothers to revive their inner Goddess and take back their life by anticipating life’s disruptions and learning to work with them rather them against them, by investing in herself: body, mind, and spirit, there is nothing she cannot accomplish.
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