“Sibling relationships have been underemphasised in learning about child development.” ~ Robert J. Waldinger
What a fascinating statement above. While I appreciate those who are only children, Mr. Waldinger may be on to something here. My sister and my relationship definitely had an important impact on who I am today and how that person formed.
I know my sister and I share a connection that will never be replaced by anyone else. I can only assume and hope that my children develop that same feeling. Always having someone who remains on their side no matter what happens, provides that extra bit of support, pushes them to be better and do what they are capable of, and yet dish the cold hard truth in loving ways even when they don’t want to hear it.
Siblings are special and I hope they always remember that fact. Will they drive each other nuts? Absolutely. Will they also find solace in the fact that they can count on each other? I certainly hope so.
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This topic remains interesting to me. I feel like disagreements among any two people happen, so calling it a rivalry seems a bit extreme. Yes, they fight. Yes, I got on my sister’s nerves and vice versa because we lived with each other and typically got in each other’s spaces and bubbles. However, the older we got, the better we were at respecting those boundaries and really showcasing each other’s strengths. We always loved each other… The way in which we were able to show this just developed over the years.
As brother and sister (and soon to be yet another sister), I hope they each develop their own sense of respect and love for one another. If my husband and I do our jobs right (I use this term loosely as there are many right ways to parent), then all three should have the tools necessary to do this in a healthy manner. Here’s to watching them grow!
Tips for Navigating Sibling Relationships:
- Establish kindness — undoubtedly there will be slip ups, but letting them know that being kind to each other is expected. I find this important.
- Supporting — I let them know that while we love them, they will be around for each other longer than we can be. So, relying on each other and helping when needed provides a little extra happy feels.
- Respect — reminding them that they should listen to what the other says. When my son says he needs some space, we tell his sister that sometimes when she wants to play doesn’t match with brother’s needs and she has to be patient.
- Reciprocity — they both happen to be loving usually at different times. But so long as they acknowledge each other’s efforts, then that is okay. If one says “I love you” the other must at least acknowledge the sentiment.
What do you do in your home to help the bond and relationships between your children?? I’d love to hear! Enjoy your moments. Learn how to engage with your child even on those really busy weeks HERE!